The Deadly Return
by NashMarquez
Summary: Losing a loved one isn't easy. How does Horatio cope with it and how will it be if the loved one returns only to hurt him further? Read and Review? :
1. Chapter 1

**A/N : Thank you for giving this a chance. hope you'll love it :) R&R?**

That morning was the same for everyone; cases rolling in, dead bodies piling up and evidence are waiting to be analyzed but it was a total different thing with Horatio. Today was different. He had become a different man; a revengeful man and a killer. His world had fallen apart the moment Marisol let out her last breath, leaving him to live his life alone. Sitting in his office, he thought of the event that happened back in Rio. He and his brother-in-law had gone down to Rio to hunt Marisol's killer.

'_I'm a killer. I killed Riaz.'_ Deep down he knew that killing Riaz wasn't a mistake. He defended and protected Eric from getting killed but his conscious mind is telling him otherwise. He had gone to Rio to avenge for Marisol's death. He knew that he had wanted that to happen. He had wanted to kill Riaz.

"H. You wanted this report?" Eric knocked and went into his office.

"Oh yes. Just leave it on the desk. Thank you." Horatio said and gave Eric a weak smile.

"You alright H?" Eric asked, knowing well that Horatio is going to say his usual 'I-am-fine' line. Eric noticed that Horatio have been acting differently ever since they returned from Rio. He was distant and quiet. He rarely joked around like he always did.

"I'm fine Eric." Horatio replied as he looked at Eric. Eric caught his blue eyes. They were filled with sadness and emptiness; unlike before; bright and filled with happiness.

"I know you're lying H. You know you can tell me anything right H?"

"I'm really fine Eric." Horatio said as he pretended to do his work.

"H, I know you miss Marisol. I miss her too." Instantaneously Horatio looked at him. Eric had hit him right on target. He knew Horatio missed Marisol so much but there was nothing he could do to help him.

"I love her Eric. I love her so much and now she's gone. I don't know what to do now. I thought by going down to Rio to hunt down Riaz, it would make me feel better." Eric could see tears forming in Horatio's eyes. Horatio then continued, "It didn't make everything better. She's not going to come back. She's never going to come back." Hands covering his face, Horatio started crying, shoulder shaking violently. "She's never going to come back to me. I killed her." He said but his words were muffled by his sobs.

"H,I know you miss her so much. I know you love her and hell I know that because right now, you're like a lifeless human H. But you can't keep on doing this. She's gone. She's never coming back. You've got to move on. I'm sure that's what she would have wanted you to do. She would never have wanted you to blame yourself." Eric reached out to him. "You didn't kill Marisol. Riaz did and you have avenged for her death."

"I just want to be with her right now. "

"I know. I know that. Sometimes I feel that way too H. But that's not what she would have wanted you to do. We all know it's easy to go there but you can't. Not yet. Pull yourself up H. You still got us. Your team, your family." Horatio looked up at him and gave him a weak smile. He wiped off his tears and straightened up.

"Thank you Eric." "H, just remember, anytime you need anyone to talk to, just come to me alright?" Horatio nodded and Eric left him. Regardless what anyone said, Horatio still couldn't brush away his guilt. To him, he caused his wife's death. As much as he wanted to forget the event, it was still etched in his mind.

That night, he went home to an empty, cold house. Just a few nights ago, Marisol was there, welcoming him home. That night was the only night Marisol welcomed him home; that memorable night. Now, everything is back to before he got married. He was going home to an empty house and sleeping on an empty bed, alone.

As he lay down on his bed, his mind brought him back to the night when Marisol was just by his side, sleeping peacefully after their passionate love-making session.

"Mari, I miss you so much. I can't do this without you. Going home to an empty house, without your presence.." He sobbed. "I miss your smile Mari. You brighten up my day when I'm down. I'll never forget the day we got married. The day we were called Mr. and Mrs. Caine. That was the happiest day in my life, with you by my side. We have too much to live for together and it was taken from us just like that. Just like that." He continued sobbing. "I really can't do this anymore Mari." Tears kept rolling down.

Feeling so ridiculously pathetic and helpless, he reached out to his nightstand and took out the bottle of sleeping pills.

'_Do it Caine. It's going to help you take away all those misery. It's gonna take away all your pain.' _That small voice speaks inside his head.

"NO! This is stupid!" He threw the bottle back into the drawer and tried to go to sleep.

'_Just do it Caine. There's nothing left for you here. Everybody is gone. Dead! Your brother, Speed and now your wife. What are you waiting for? What are you still living for?' _The voice speaks again as he tossed and turned on the bed. "Go away! Why are you doing this!" He screamed into the pillow.

'_Don't kid yourself. Don't lie to yourself. You know you want this. You know you need this. You need to get away from all these pain and misery. Just end it Caine. End it and it will all go away.'_

_**TBC... :)**  
_


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N : I hope you're still here :) Thank you! This is the instalment chapter for this story and I hope you love it. R&R?**

"Hey Eric, where's Horatio?" Calleigh asked in her chirpy tone.

"No idea. Have you checked his office?"

"Yeah I did. Even asked around but no one has seen him. This is so unusual of him; being late. Usually he's the first to come in."

"I don't know. Try giving him a call. Maybe he went to a scene?"

"Well if he's at a scene, then why are we here." Calleigh chuckled. "Yeah okay I'm goin' to call him." She continued as fished out her cellphone and made a call to Horatio's.

"No answer." Calleigh said. "Try again?" Calleigh then tried again but the result were the same. There was still no answer. She waited another 10 minutes to dial his number again. "Still no answer. Did he say anything to you? Maybe he's goin' somewhere?"

"Nope. Try asking Frank. Maybe he knows." Eric said. Deep down he was getting worried as seconds passed by especially after yesterday's talk he had with Horatio. "You know what Cal, I think I'm going to check on him at his place. It's already 10. He was supposed to be in 2 hours ago. He knows better to inform us if he's going to be late."

"I'm taggin'. I have the key to his apartment. For emergency." Eric nodded. He wouldn't want to break into Horatio's apartment without any concrete reasoning. During the ride, Eric sped his way, hoping that Horatio hadn't done anything stupid. He knew that Horatio was devastated and distraught. As soon as they reached Horatio's place, they rushed to the door and knocked on it but there was no response. Calleigh used her set of keys to open the door and both she and Eric split up to check on Horatio. Eric took the second floor while Calleigh took the first.

"Calleigh! I've got something!" Eric shouted and rushed down to the first floor with an empty unlabeled bottle.

"What is it Eric?" She asked, panicking and waiting for him to catch his breath. He showed her the bottle and Calleigh gasped. "Oh my god. What's going on Eric?" She asked.

"We better find him. Search every corner of the house. I've covered the top floor. So you'll cover the house, I'll cover the perimeter of the house. Call for help Cal. This doesn't look good." Eric instructed and Calleigh nodded, fishing out her cellphone and immediately called for help. She quickly continued her search for Horatio.

She suddenly stopped, froze at the sight of Horatio lying on his back on the kitchen floor with white foam formed in his mouth.

"ERIC! YOU NEED TO GET IN HERE QUICK!" She hollered Eric immediately as she rushed to Horatio's side and saw an empty bottle of whiskey by his side. "Oh Handsome. What happened to you. You shouldn't have resorted to this and you know it." She whispered as she wiped of the foam around his mouth.

"Wha-" Eric gasped as he stood there flabbergasted at the view right before him. "Oh my god H." At that moment, he saw the empty bottle of whiskey and he summed it up. _'Oh God H. Didn't I tell you to come to me. I should have known you better not to leave you alone yesterday.' _He thought to himself.

"Eric, he's not breathing." Calleigh said as tears formed in her eyes. He quickly went over and crouched beside him. Just then, the paramedics came in.

"Ma'am, Sir, please step aside." They instructed as they started working on him.

"He's not breathing." Calleigh told them.

"We're doing our best here Ma'am." They tried to revive him by shocking his heart. "We got a pulse!" The paramedic hollered as they quickly lifted him up onto the stretcher and put him into the ambulance.

"Ma'am, can you tell me what happened?" The paramedic asked as he attended to Horatio.

"We don't know. We arrived and found him lying there on the floor."

"Alright. We'll do our best." At that point, there was a beep, indicating that his blood pressure was decreasing. "We're losing him! Get the defibrillator!" They shocked him twice before getting him back. "He's back!"

"Hang on Horatio. Just hang on. Don't give up just yet."

As they reached the hospital, they quickly transferred him onto the gurney and was brought into the emergency room. Eric and Calleigh had to wait at the waiting lounge. Eric was pacing up and down, worried about what might happen to Horatio while Calleigh was seated on the couch, just staring into blank space. She too, was worried about what might happen to Horatio because his condition wasn't looking good at that point of time.

"Eric, what happened?" Calleigh finally broke the silence.

"I don't know Cal. I thought he was fine yesterday after we talked. He sounded fine." Eric leaned his body on the wall.

"Talked? What about?"

"About Rio. And Marisol. He couldn't get over the fact that Marisol is gone. He blamed himself for her death."

"What? Oh my god." Calleigh gasped.

"I told him that it wasn't. And that he has already avenged her death. But it didn't seem enough. Looks like he still blames himself."

"Riaz is dead?"

"Yes. He was attacking me with a knife and Horatio tried to protect me." By now, Eric was already crouching on the floor, leaning onto the wall. "I didn't know this would happen. I shouldn't have left him alone. I should have known he wouldn't get over it. I should have stayed with him!" Eric said with his head hanging. He was sobbing.

"Eric, don't blame yourself. You didn't know."

"I knew Cal. I was there. His eyes were empty and sad. I knew something was wrong."

Suddenly Calleigh's phone rang. It was Frank.

"Yes Frank? A letter? No we didn't see any letters. Oh you're coming down? Alright. Thanks."

"They found a letter." She stated. "Frank's coming down with it."

A moment later, Frank came in with the letter and he had a remorseful look on his face as he handed out the letter to Calleigh.

"It wasn't an accident Cal. He tried to end his life." Both Eric and Calleigh looked at each other and back to Frank, giving him a nod of acknowledgement.

Both of them started reading.

_I'm sorry for what I have done. Maybe, by the time you read this, I'll be gone already, walking towards Marisol and being happy with her. I am really sorry for this. I just couldn't go on. Especially not without Marisol. I've tried, trust me but I just can't. There's nothing left for me here. There's nothing for me to live for, to fight for. Everybody is gone. Speed, Ray and now Marisol. She was my love, my life and I don't want to go on without her. I didn't mean to hurt anyone. Believe me. I am truly and deeply sorry for the pain I have caused. I had so much to live for especially with Marisol. I had envisioned my future with her, having a family together but all that was taken away from me. In just a split second. I can't go home to an empty house anymore. I don't want to wake up in an empty bed. _

_Thank you for the joys and memories I have had through the great team, family and friends. Perhaps I am not as strong as you thought I am. I'm just as weak, vulnerable and pathetic. I'm a coward but I'd like to think what I'm doing as an act of resolution. _

_Eric, my brother, I'm really sorry. I don't want you to blame yourself on this. I did this on my own. I brought this upon myself. I loved her so much and I don't think I can move on anymore. Everyone has left me and I've got nothing else._

_Calleigh sweetheart, if you're reading this, I love you. Marisol is my present and my future but you, sweetheart, were my past. I loved you before and there will always be space for you in my heart. I have never told you about this but I have loved you from far._

_To the team, thank you for looking up on me and I'm sorry if this changes your view on me. I'm not as strong as you thought I am. I am still human, with flaws and weaknesses. There is so much more that I could say and want to say, but I have to be satisfied and hope that this is all I should say. _

_I'M SORRY._

_HORATIO CAINE_

_**TBC... :)**  
_


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N : Thank you for staying with me. and i would like to thank those who reviewed in the other chapters. :)**

Calleigh had tears in her eyes. Eric felt like crushing that piece of paper and chuck it into the bin while Frank only stood there, nothing to say.

"Detectives…" A doctor came in and broke the tension in the waiting lounge. "I'm Dr. Wilson. I believe you're waiting for Horatio Caine?" All three of them nodded. "His condition doesn't look good right now."

"What do you mean?" Calleigh asked in a panicked tone.

"One important question. Was it an accident or an intentional act?" All three of them looked at each other then back to Dr. Wilson. Eric was fiddling around with the piece of paper in his hands. "From your reaction and that paper in your hands, I can assume it's intentional?" The three of them just hung their heads and nodded silently.

"Okay. You found him just in time before all the pills get absorbed into his system. Do you know what he took?" All of them shook their heads but Eric spoke up.

"I found an empty unlabeled bottle in his room and there was an empty whiskey bottle."

"So that explains the quick chemical reaction. Fortunately, we managed to pump out the remaining pills that weren't absorbed into his system so that it wasn't fatal enough to kill him. But, the ones that have been absorbed into his system have destroyed his liver."

"Oh my god." Calleigh gasped. Eric and Frank were stunned and just speechless. "So, what happens now?" Frank spoke up.

"Right now we're still monitoring him very closely and trying not to get him to crash again. He crashed twice before coming here and once in the operating theatre."

"Will he be okay?" Calleigh asked.

"Like I said, we're still monitoring him very closely. He's suffering from Acute Liver Failure. It was fortunate enough for him. It could've been worse."

"What did he take?"

"Lab tests confirmed that it was Zolpidem. Not fatal but if taken excessively and with alcohol, that's what happened to Mr. Caine there. You can see him but only from the outside. He's quite vulnerable to any viruses right now. And once he wakes up, I want you to understand that his emotional state isn't stable. I would suggest a therapist but let's wait till he comes to." Dr. Wilson said as he guided them to Horatio's room.

"Will he get well?"

"It depends. We can give him the treatment but it all depends on his will to live. If he doesn't want to live, he might just give up and not live. We're doing our very best to give him the treatment and trying to save him."

"Thank you." They all three said in union and Dr. Wilson just left them three of them just stood there in silence. Horatio looked so vulnerable. He was supported by all the machines around him. Never before have they seen him like this.

"Who knows?" Calleigh looked at Frank.

"No one besides the team."

"Then we keep it that way. Call the team here now."

As soon as the rest of the team arrived at the hospital, Calleigh gathered them in the waiting lounge to talk to them. "No one outside this immediate family can know what just happened. No one." Calleigh emphasized on 'No One'. "We'll give him the benefit of doubt and we'll stay with him through this." They just nodded. "Horatio doesn't need anyone to judge him right now. We need to give him our support." Calleigh continued.

His secrets will be kept amongst them. No one will know about it, including IAB; especially Rick Stetler. What they will know is Horatio had an accident. Nothing more than that. Two days passed by but Horatio still haven't made any progress. He wasn't waking up yet. On the third day however, Horatio woke up. He wasn't calm at all. He was in rage.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST LET ME DIE! WHY CAN'T YOU LET ME GO! I COULD HAVE BEEN WITH MARISOL RIGHT NOW!" Horatio blared in a fit of temper, moving his body violently.

"Horatio, please, calm down."

"NO! YOU TOOK AWAY EVERYTHING FROM ME! I WANT TO BE WITH MARISOL!" He was knocking over the machine, trying to get all the wires off him. Calleigh couldn't bear to see him like this. She straightened herself and stood on firm ground.

"YOU LISTEN TO ME HORATIO! I COULD HAVE JUST LEFT YOU ON THE FLOOR OF YOUR KITCHEN AND LET YOU DIE! BUT I'M NOT SURE IF YOU'RE GOING TO BE WITH MARISOL! YOU REALLY WANT TO DIE LIKE THAT? WITH NO DIGNITY?" Calleigh bawled as she yanked his arms over his head, not allowing him to move an inch. Horatio didn't even try to look at her. He was looking at another direction.

"LOOK AT ME HORATIO! TURN YOUR FACE AND LOOK AT ME!" Slowly, he turned to look at her. Calleigh looked at him, he was empty, miserable. "I didn't let you die because you still have lots of things to live for. Many people need you. Marisol may be gone but she'll always be in your heart. She will always be there. I'm sure she wouldn't have wanted you to do this. Give yourself another chance to live. To find something to live for." Calleigh said softly as she gently let go of his arms and brushed his hair from his face.

"I don't have anything to live for. I've lost everything. Speed, Ray, now Marisol." He wept.

"You still have us. Your team. Your family. I want you to remember that. And if after this you still want to end your life, I will do nothing to stop you Horatio. Because I've tried to save you. I can't keep saving you when you yourself don't want to save yourself."

"I can't do this alone." He said. "You're not alone. You have us Horatio. Your family."

"You read the letter." He wasn't asking. He knew she would have read it.

"I did. And we'll talk about that when you get better." She smiled.

After that day, Horatio tried to manage with his suicidal thoughts, with the help of a therapist and the support of the team. Psychologically and emotionally, he was improving. However, his liver still needed intensive care.

"Morning Lieutenant." A nurse came in.

"Mari?" He asked. He recognized that voice behind the mask. He remembered that soothing voice. It was like a lullaby to him.

"I'm sorry Lieutenant. I think you got the wrong person. I'm Miss Williams, your attending nurse."

"No. You're Marisol. I know that voice. Mari, please."

"Sorry Lieutenant. You got the wrong person." She said as she injected him with sedatives to sedate him. "I'm sorry Horatio. I'm sorry."

"NURSE! Where is Lieutenant Caine?" Calleigh shouted across the room. "Miss Duquesne, is there anything wrong?" "ANYTHING WRONG? WHERE IS LIEUTENANT CAINE! I JUST LEFT HIM FOR THE CAFÉ FOR 20MINUTES!" Calleigh blared. "But he was still there when I checked him 15minutes ago. Have you checked the toilet?" "I WOULDN'T HAVE ASKED YOU IF HE WAS THERE!" Calleigh was making a commotion in the hospital.

After an hour and a whole search of the hospital, they decided to expand the search. Horatio was nowhere in the hospital. All of them were already panicking.

"You sure he didn't run away and want to try killing himself?" Frank asked.

"Well if he wanted to try ending his life again, he would have done last week when he woke up. He went for therapy Frank. He tried to get better. What makes you think he want to kill himself again?" Calleigh was getting more worried. Frank thought of it and Calleigh was right. He would have done it last week if he wanted to.

* * *

"You want me to what?" The woman spoke.

"Kill him you bitch! I want you to kill your Lieutenant!"

"No! You promised you're not going to hurt him!"

"And you really believe that huh stupid bitch?" The man then laughed hysterically. "Wake him up!"

The woman did as she was told. She tried to wake him up but he only stirred. "Horatio darling, wake up please." Right then, his eyes fluttered open.

"Marisol?"

**TBC...Reviews?**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N : Thank you for the reviews and readers who still read this. I hope you loved the previous chapter and this one too. Reviews?**

"Marisol?" Horatio asked groggily.

"Oh great! The Great Horatio Caine is finally awake!" The man said mockingly, clapping his hands in the air.

"Mari?" Horatio called out again.

"Oh yes Lieutenant. That's your Marisol." The man spoke as he pulled Horatio's head back. "Shocked eh Lieutenant?" He smirked. "How about we let her explain to you?" Horatio could only afford to look at her with disappointment in his eyes.

* * *

"Detectives, we need to get Lieutenant Caine fast. He needs the treatment or his liver could fail on him totally. If he doesn't get the treatment in time, his condition is going to get worse and the week of treatment will be a waste." Dr. Wilson reminded Eric and Calleigh.

"We get that Doctor. We're trying our best to find him. Is there any other treatments?"

"Transplant. But we have to see if there's donor suitable with him. Let's focus on finding him first." Dr. Wilson said.

* * *

"Come on. Explain to him Bitch!" The man dragged her. "Explain to him what happened!"

"Mari…" He called out weakly. She went towards Horatio slowly and reached out to him. "I'm sorry Horatio. I had to. I was forced by them." She said softly. At that moment, the man hit Horatio in his face with a brass knuckles.

"What the hell! You said you won't hurt him!" She stood up immediately and shoved the man into the wall.

"Well then you better tell him you did this out of your own will! That you lied to him! That you were part of us!" The man grabbed her neck, strangling her.

"Fine! Now let me go Josh!" She then walked towards Horatio with a confident stride and looked straight into his eyes. "You heard him. I did this to hurt you. I lied to you." She had tears in her eyes.

"Marisol.. I know you're lying." Horatio was already bleeding from under his left eyes. "No Horatio. I'm not. I brought you here. It was their plan to hurt you and I'm the one who sedated you and transported you here. I'm sorry."

"Okay. Enough of this mushy stuff already. You, get into that room! I'm gonna have some fun here with our dearest Lieutenant. Then you'll have him to yourself to finish him off." Josh said as he shoved her into the room and locked it.

From inside the room, she could only hear his grunts and groans. She knew he was taking one hell of a beating. Josh was a mean bastard. The first punch to Horatio's face almost knocked him off. She don't know how long more Horatio could stand the beatings. She knew Josh would take his time with Horatio and there was nothing she could do to stop him. She was already locked in the room.

"AAARRRGGGGHHHHHH!" There came a scream. It was Horatio. She knew that it was his last straw. He probably couldn't take it any longer. She banged the door as hard as she could but there was no response.

'_God please help him. I hope Calleigh and Eric find that letter fast.' _She prayed silently behind those doors. The door suddenly opened.

"Your turn."

Hanging her head low, she walked over unenthusiastically. She prayed and hoped that he was still alive because there was no groans, no grunts. It was quiet. She suddenly stopped dead in her tracks upon seeing what's in front of her. Horatio was seated on the chair, head hanging low. He was motionless and bleeding all over his face. She quickly rushed over to his side.

"I give you an hour to finish him off. If not, I'll finish him myself." She just glared at Josh.

Slowly, she brought Horatio out of the chair and laid him on the floor with her lap as his pillow. "Oh Horatio. I'm so sorry." She said as she wiped his hair off his face and tore a piece of her shirt to wipe off the blood on his face. She then wiped the blood off gently.

* * *

"Ms. Duquesne, we found this envelope in his drawer addressed to you and Mr. Delko." One of the nurses said as she handed over the envelope. Frank, Eric and Calleigh glanced at each other.

"Oh don't tell me it's another suicide letter." Frank said sarcastically.

"Frank! Please! Not now." Calleigh glared at him.

"Alright. Sorry." Frank said defeated as he had his hands over his head, in a surrender manner.

All three of them looked at the letter with Eric reading it out aloud.

"_Dear Eric and Calleigh,_

_ I know both of you will get angry at me for doing this to all of you but I had no choice. I didn't want to Horatio to get hurt. I love him so much that I had to do this. The Mala Noche had come to me and told me that if I don't go with them, they would kill Horatio off. I don't want to hurt him and so I agreed with it. I know how devastated and broken Horatio was when I was gone. I even know that he tried to kill himself. I was there, at the hospital, watching him all these while and I was tracking his progress. _

_Right now, I've been tasked to nab him from the hospital or the Mala Noche would come to him and kill him straight off. I don't want to do that to him. I know he was trying to turn his life over and had tried to get better. I've seen how he was getting help and treatment. I'm so sorry to have done this; to take him away from the hospital despite knowing his condition. Trust me, I don't want to. _

_I need you to come over to 38__th__ Ave once you've read this letter. There will be a warehouse and Horatio will be kept in there. You need to be quick before they do anything to Horatio. Please, I don't want him to get hurt further. I've hurt him once and I don't want to do it anymore._

_Eric, I'm so sorry to have lied to you and not even inform you of this. I did this for Horatio. I love him so much that I couldn't bear to lose him._

_Calleigh, from the way you cared for him past few days, I knew you care deeply for him. And trust me, he cares for you too. I know you were his past before me but right now, I beg you to take care of him for me. Bring him back to you. Only you can help him. Please don't give up on him. _

_Marisol Delko Caine_

"Frank, we need back up now at the 38th ave. Right now!" Calleigh ordered with full authority.

* * *

"Is he still fucking breathing! I told you to finish him off!" Josh pulled her shirt and dragged her across the room. "If you're not going to finish him off, I will!" Right then, he shoved her onto the floor and went angrily at Horatio with a gun in his hand and pressed the nuzzle of the gun into his temple.

"That's it Lieutenant. Say goodbye." Josh said as he waved his hand to Horatio. "Say goodbye to your wife and to the world." He smirked. Horatio could only look at him, defenseless and defeated. He was too weak to fight it off. Feeling defeated, he could only close his eyes, waiting for the gun to go off. This was what he initially wanted anyway, to die.

**TBC... Reviews?**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N : Thank you for staying through the story and I really appreciate the nice comments :) Review?**

Being pushed to the wall and being stuck at gun point, Horatio had seen a flash of his life; of his time together with Marisol especially. He knew this was it. It was almost the end, until he suddenly heard someone else's voice and no longer felt the cold metal on his head.

"STOP!" She shouted as she lunged onto Josh. "I'll do it. You leave him right now! I'll finish him off myself."

"Good!" He said as he moved aside.

"Now move away! And give me that knife!" She yelled. "What for?" The man asked. "I'm gonna make him suffer first." She said, lying to him. She needed to buy time for Calleigh and Eric to reach. She just snatched the knife from the holster and pulled Horatio into a sitting position.

"I'm sorry Horatio. I'm really sorry I had to hurt you. I love you and I don't want you to get killed." She said as she slowly plunged the knife into his skin and dragged it across his chest. She had tears in her eyes seeing that blood trickle down his body. She didn't cut him deep. It was just a shallow cut because she couldn't bear to hurt Horatio so much. It was just an act to buy time.

"I'm really sorry." She said again, seeing the pain and hurt in his eyes. She knew Horatio had felt so betrayed.

"I loved you, you know." Despite the pain, Horatio whispered so quietly only she could hear. She felt a pang to her heart. That short line was just enough to make a tear drop. His tone clearly proved a sense of betrayal that he felt.

"I know Horatio. Trust me, I love you. But I'm really sorry I had to do this to you." She said as she stroked his face gently.

"Why are you doing this to me if you love me?"

"You'll know it one day. And I hope when the day comes, you'll understand and I hope you'll forgive me for doing this. And promise me you'll not try to end your life again. It's not worth it Horatio. Calleigh loves you and I know you love her. Go to her Horatio. You're better off with her. Promise me you'll start anew with her. "

*BANG*

"What the hell Josh!" She turned immediately.

"You're too slow! That's a warning. Just kill him off will ya! Stop delaying!"

"Can't you just let me have my fun! You've already had yours!"

"You were talking Bitch!" He screamed.

"Cal, you take the front with Eric and I'll cover the back." Frank demanded. The both of them just nodded and quickly got into position as soon as they stepped out of the hummer. They have had backups surrounding the area. There was no way the guy would escape.

'_Dear God, please help Horatio.' _Calleigh prayed silently.

"You know what. You're too slow. I'm gonna do it for you." Josh had his gun pointed at Horatio. He cocked the safety gear and all they heard was a loud bang.

"NOOOOOO!" It was too late. Josh had already pulled the trigger.

"Cal…" Eric whispered, looking her in the eyes.

'_That better not be Horatio.' _Calleigh hoped desperately.

"Let's go." She ordered as she motioned for the rest of the team to proceed.

"MIAMI DADE POLICE!" Calleigh and Eric busted through the front door as well as two other backups while Frank and Ryan had the back door, blocking all exits.

"Put your gun down and slide it across the room!" Calleigh commanded and she took a glance over at the motionless body on the ground. Her heart broke when she saw Horatio covered in his own blood. Josh slowly slid the gun across the room and followed as instructed.

"GET ON YOUR KNEES AND HANDS OVER YOUR HEAD!" Eric shouted. His blood boiled further when he saw Horatio lying there motionless beside Marisol. He rushed to Josh and cuffed him up and shoved him to the officers waiting by Frank's side.

"Take this son-of-a-bitch and put his sorry ass into prison!" Frank and Ryan yelled.

Before the officers took him away, Eric went to him. "You better pray hard those two are alive or you'll be fucking sorry!" Eric snarled.

Eric and Calleigh quickly rushed to Horatio who was already bleeding.

"Hey little brother." Marisol said softly. "Hey Mari. You hang in there alright. The paramedics are here."

"No Eric please. Stay here with me. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I did this to you. I know how you must be feeling right now."

"Shhh Mari. Please. You'll be alright." He said as he pressed on to her gunshot wound. She took the bullet to the chest as she was trying to shield Horatio from it. Eric knew he was lying because the shot was fatal. She was bleeding too much.

"Tell Horatio I'm sorry and tell him I loved him. I really do." She said as she shoved a piece of envelope into his hand. "Give this to Horatio and Calleigh. I'm sorry Eric. I love you." With that, she breathed her last breath and she was gone. This time, for real. Horatio on the other hand was rushed to the hospital as soon as they found a weak pulse and was given priority. Frank waited with Calleigh in the waiting lounge.

"So, here we are again." Frank said and looked at Calleigh. "I don't like this Cal…being in the hospital…waiting on the same person again. We better put security outside his room. More security." He continued.

"He better make it out Frank."

"Cal, don't you worry. That guy took one hell of a beating and he still had a pulse. He'll live. He's hard like steel." Frank assured her.

"Calleigh. Frank. How's Horatio?" Eric barged in.

"Eric. I thought you were with Marisol?" Calleigh asked. Eric couldn't look at her. "Eric?"

"She's gone Cal…She's gone. This time for real." Eric said but didn't look at her still.

"Oh I'm sorry Eric. I'm so sorry." Calleigh said as she hugged him tight to comfort him.

"It's okay Calleigh. It happens. She took the bullet to the chest."

"I should've been there with you."

"Cal, Horatio needs you more. It's okay." Eric then broke the hug. "She's on her way to the morgue. I can't be there. I can't see her like that. I need to be here." Eric then broke down.

"Hey. It's okay. You can stay here."

Frank on the other hand, didn't know what to say or what to do but he acted like how a big brother would act. He took Eric and gave him a brotherly hug. "It's okay Eric. Let it go. We'll all be here with you." "Thank you Frank. Thank you." Just then, Dr. Wilson came in.

"You better consider yourself lucky that his liver did not get worse. He's got some fractured bones and minor cuts and bruises. But…" He paused. "He doesn't want to talk or eat. But he kept repeating '_I promise'. _What the hell happened?"

"Is he accepting the treatment?"

"Surprisingly he is. He did not fight it off. But he won't talk to any of the nurses. What did he promise?"

"We don't know."

"Oh and Ms. Duquesne, he called out your name. I think he will only see you." With that, he left them and Calleigh went to see him.

"Horatio?" She called out. Her heart broke when she saw him with cuts and bruises on his face. He was just lying there looking somewhere else. He was so far away; deep in thoughts. "Horatio?" She called out again, this time walking towards his bed. There was still no response. Gently, she laid her hand on top of his hand and called out to him again. He flinched at her touch. "It's okay Horatio. It's just me, Calleigh." She said softly and Horatio became more relaxed. Horatio was quiet but Calleigh knew that he was deep in thoughts, probably thinking of what just happened.

"She's gone isn't she?" He suddenly spoke up. Calleigh didn't know how to respond to that but only nodded a little.

"I'm sorry Horatio."

"I'm sorry too." He said softly.

"Horatio, I beg you not to try to end your life again or refuse the treatment. I know how the situation has just gotten worse."

"Calleigh, I'm here and taking the treatment. I promised her Cal, I promised her that I won't do anything stupid." He admitted to her about the promise, but just half of it. "I just am not ready to meet anyone else. I need some time alone to think and heal. I just need you to stay here with me while I try that."

"Horatio, trust me, I won't go anywhere. I'm here to help you." She smiled at him.

"I saw you."

"What? Saw me where Horatio?" She asked, trying to search answers in his eyes. She thought he might be under the influence of the morphine.

"My life…It replayed in my mind when that gun was pressed into my head." He said looking at the other side of the room. "You were there. You. Apart from Marisol."

"Horatio, please. Not now okay. I just need you to get better. Talk to me when you're much more ready."

"I don't need therapy session!" He got agitated.

"That's not what I meant. Please. Listen to me." She said as she gently reached out to him. "I don't want you to stress yourself over this. We need you to get better. Physically especially. Please Horatio?" She looked straight into his eyes as she continued.

"No more therapy?" He asked with fear and vulnerability in his tone.

"You need it. Please? After all you've been through; I just need to make sure you'll be alright. Okay?" She asked him soothingly and he simply nodded. "You don't have to worry. I'll be here with you. Now you rest alright. I'll be right back." She smiled and kissed him on the forehead before leaving him to sleep.

She went back to the lab to finish off the case when she found Eric in the locker room crying so hard she could hear it from outside. She wanted to leave him alone but at the same time, she didn't want to leave him alone, with no one to be there for him at such crucial time. "Eric?" She called as she stepped into the locker room, seeing Eric seated on the bench and crying with his hands covering his face. She sat next to him and softly tapped his shoulders to let him know that she's there for him.

"Eric I know how hard this is. You know I'm here for you right. Talk to me Eric." Eric didn't reply. He was too caught up crying his hearts out.

"She lied Cal! She lied to me. She lied to Horatio! She should have just come forward and this wouldn't have happened!" Suddenly Eric broke out in the midst of crying. "Eric…" "No Cal! She betrayed us all. She hurt me and she hurt Horatio especially! She was the person I trusted most yet she didn't even bother telling me all this! I'm her brother!" And he broke out again. All of a sudden, amidst those anger and cries, Eric pounced on her, pushing her into the wall and kissed her hungrily.

**TBC... Review?**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N : Sorry for the long wait but i was caught up. I hope you enjoy this chapter :) and thank you for the reviews :)**

"Eric…Wha-what a-are you doing." She gasped in between her words. Eric kept on kissing her and pushing her against the wall. Eric's grip was too strong for her to push him away and she couldn't shout because Eric was forceful in kissing her. She kept trying to free herself but to no avail.

"What the fuck!" Frank shouted. He was looking for Calleigh regarding the case and found them in the locker room. Immediately after, Calleigh slapped Eric across his face.

"So much for trust, Eric!" She stormed out of the locker room and into the ladies.

Gently rubbing his now redden cheek, he was recalling his actions earlier. _'Oh shit! I have so messed this up! Oh my god. Now Calleigh will never trust me again.' _He thought.

"You're so screwed man." Frank said. "You definitely broke her trust. What the fuck were you even thinking?" He continued.

"I know. I'm sorry."

"You should be apologizing to her not me." Frank replied and Eric went straight towards the ladies to find Calleigh.

"Calleigh. I'm so sorry. I know I went overboard."

"Go away Eric! I don't want to see you. Just get out."

"Calleigh please. I know I'm wrong. I know I shouldn't have done that." Eric kept apologizing.

"Please Eric. I don't need this nonsense. I'm already having enough with Horatio. Just go." Calleigh replied, sobbing in between. Eric left her in the ladies and went to the lab. On his way, Frank was outside the trace lab, waiting for him.

"Eric, what the hell were you thinking doing that to Cal?"

"I don't know Frank. I messed up. I was so beaten up with what happened."

"Seriously? That's not an excuse Delko! You screwed up big time! Now I want you to get out of here before she comes out. If Horatio knows this, I don't know what will happen to him. Betrayed by his own wife now by his own brother-in-law. " Eric couldn't argue further with Frank and immediately walked towards the elevator.

"Wait!" Eric turned to that voice. It was Calleigh. "Cal…" "Shush Eric. It's over and I want you to forget it ever happened. Please. There was nothing going on and there will be nothing going on."

"I understand and I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have done that. I'm really sorry Cal." Calleigh nodded and Eric continued walking to the elevator. "Oh and before I forget, Marisol left a letter for you and H." He said as he handed her the envelopes. She went into Horatio's office to be alone and opened the envelope that was addressed to her. Frank just left her to be alone.

_Dear Calleigh, _

_ If you're reading this, the situation probably turned out bad. I know what you're thinking. I've hurt Horatio so much. I've betrayed him and cheated him about my death. I lied to him and I worked with the Mala Noche to hurt him further. But it wasn't my intention to hurt him or to lie to him. I was forced into this. You should know well the Mala Noche and how ruthless they are. I had to work with them and keep it a secret or they would kill him. I don't want that to happen to him. _

_ The day of the shooting, the Mala Noche came into the hospital to cut a deal with me. They wanted Horatio to suffer and only my death could do that. Taking him and hurting like that wasn't my intention. I love Horatio so much that I don't him to get hurt or get killed. Never have I expected that Horatio would try to end his life. I have been watching him all these time while I was gone. I knew he was a wreck._

_ I want you to understand Calleigh that I never meant for this to happen and I don't want to see him hurt anymore. I am now his past. I know you care him deeply. I can sense it. At the hospital, I can see how you cared for him and how worried you were about him. Once, he admitted to me that he has loved you from the moment you came into the lab. He said it was like you changed his life but he never dared to confess his feelings. I never doubt his feelings towards me but I know deep down that you still have a place in his heart. At that moment, I was his present and his future but right now, I'm his past. I'm gone Calleigh. _

_I just don't want him to get hurt anymore. I don't want him to lose faith again. You've helped him restore his faith in life and I don't want him to go back to the dark phase anymore. I really hope you would be with him through this because I know you care for him. Please take care of him Calleigh. He needs someone like you._

_Yours Truly,_

_Marisol_

At the end of reading the letter, there were already tear droplets on the piece of paper. The situation was more complicated than she ever thought. Yes, she does care for Horatio and she does have a little more than that for him but she isn't sure what it is. They had flirted through the years and they've had a great friendship. She needed time to process and think this through. Even if she does love him, she doesn't want to take the wrong steps because she doesn't want to be just a replacement. Yes, all the guys she had dated back then were all far from what Horatio is but she needed to be sure of what she feels towards him.

She wiped her tears away and straightened herself up then left Horatio's office in a rush, not realizing that she left her letter on his desk. She went to search for Frank at his desk.

"Hey Frank." "Hey Cal. You okay?"

"Yeah. Oh don't worry about that." Calleigh smiled. "Look, can you do me a favor?"

"Sure. What is it?"

"Can you keep this letter and give Horatio this letter when he gets better. I don't want to stress him out now."

"Why can't you just give it to him yourself? You'll be going to the hospital right?" Frank asked, confused.

"Please? Just do it for me okay?" She pleaded with him and walked off. Frank looked at her walk off and suddenly grabbed her arm gently.

"Cal, tell me what's wrong. I know something is up."

"Frank. Let me go." Calleigh shrugged his hand off her and ran as quickly as possible to the garage and drove off aimlessly. Frank was left confused. Calleigh drove as fast as she could to get away from everything. She had no destination in mind. She was just going as far as she could.

'_DAMMIT! This is so messed up!'_ She thought. _'Horatio in the hospital trying to get over everything, Eric kissed me and now Marisol.' _She suddenly came to a stop. _'I need to get away from all of this. I need to think. I really need some space to think!' _She thought again and made her way to the airport and booked a last minute ticket to Louisiana; her hometown. She needed the peace there; especially fresh air. As soon as she reached Louisiana, she made her way to her house where her mother lives. Her mother knows better than to ask her what brought her back down there and that made her felt at ease coming home.

The next day, Frank visited Horatio in the hospital. "Hey H. Feeling better?"

"Much better than yesterday. Where's Calleigh?" That question caught him in a spot. He had to come up with an answer quick.

"Think she's at the lab doing the report or something." Frank lied. "Why? Is there anything you wanna talk to her about?"

"No. I was just asking. She didn't come back yesterday. She said she'll be back." Horatio had disappointment in his tone. Frank stepped out of the room and tried calling Calleigh but there was no service on her line. She was unavailable and out of reach. _'She's running away…but from what? Didn't she let go of what happened between her and Eric?'_ Frank thought.

Frank went back to the lab to make sure his theory that Calleigh was indeed running away. He didn't know why but from yesterday's incident, he knew something was wrong but Calleigh won't talk to him. He went into Horatio's office where she last was seen and found the letter on the desk.

"Oh my god. So this is what she's running away from!" Frank gasped and quickly recovered himself and went to search for Eric in the trace lab. "Eric!"

"What's up Francis?"

"Do you have any idea where's Calleigh?"

"Nope. Why?"

"Found this letter on Horatio's office desk and Calleigh's nowhere to be seen and she's out of reach." Eric took the letter from Frank and he too, had the same reaction.

"So, she's running away from this?" Eric came to the same conclusion. Frank just shrugged his shoulders.

Meanwhile, Calleigh was at her hometown, trying to sort things out. She needed to figure out her feelings towards Horatio. She switched off her cellphone so that she wouldn't be disturbed and so no one could trace her where being. _'Do I really care for him? Is it obvious? But I'm not even sure of my feelings.' _Those were the only questions that ran through her mind as she sat on the porch.

"Calleigh…" Her mum called out.

"Hi."

"Are you alright? You've been staring out since you've been here. I know you don't like me asking but I'm worried about you. And you being here means something."

"I'm okay Mum. I just needed some space to think. To sort out some issues." Calleigh explained briefly; not going into the details of it. With that, her mum left her alone, to give her some space. Days passed and Calleigh was still at her hometown. She still hasn't sorted her mind out and has not decided on what to do.

"Frank, where's Calleigh? Is she alright? I mean…uhm… she hasn't been here." Horatio said hesitatingly. Frank just stared at him not knowing what to say. "Honestly Francis. Is she alright?"

"We don't know Horatio. She just left and we're not able to reach her." Frank answered honestly but couldn't look at Horatio in the eyes.

"She just left without saying a word?" Horatio was upset. Frank just nodded. It was silent right after. Horatio was too upset to say anything.

"Hey. We're still tracking her alright. She'll be fine."

"No it's okay Frank. I'll be fine. It's her right to leave whenever she wants to. It's just that…" He paused, trying to hold back his tears. "I've just went through so much. I thought maybe she would be here when I needed someone." He rolled his eyes up, controlling the tears that were already forming in his eyes.

"She gave me hope. She restored my faith in life and now she just disappears and pulls away. She told me that I had many things to live for and told me that I'm never alone. That I have her and the team. But now she's gone. She's pulling away from me. What have I done wrong?" The tears formed had rolled down the corner of his eyes and Frank caught that.

"Hey… you still have us. The team. I'm sure she had her reasons."

"No Frank. It was me. I wrote in that letter I loved her. I WAS SUPPOSED TO DIE! NOT ALIVE!" He screamed. "I was supposed to die…" He sobbed.

'_Calleigh. You better come back where ever you are right now! You should see what you've done to Horatio right now.' _Frank thought. Horatio was being suicidal all over again.

"Everyone I love leaves! Why would I even live anymore! I don't deserve it! That guy should have just shot me! Not Marisol! Even Marisol lied to me! Hurt me! I don't even see the purpose of me living anymore! Everyone lied! And everyone is going to leave me sooner or later!" He screamed and pulled off all the wires on his body. He was suicidal all over again. Probably feeling hurt and betrayed by everyone around him.

**TBC... Reviews?**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N : Thank you for the positive reviews and i'm glad you enjoyed it :) Hope you enjoy this chapter as well **

Frank quickly called for assistance and the nurse doze him with tranquilizer to calm him down.

"Eric. We really need to find Calleigh. Right now. He's not good. He's in a rage. Suicidal all over again." Frank told him.

As Calleigh was seated at the patio alone, looking out towards the yard, she was brought back to the time when John Hagen remarked about Horatio being lonely.

"Hey Sweetheart." Her mum called out. _'Ho-' _She paused at that thought.

"Hey mum."

"I made you coffee. I've been watching you out here just staring. I know you love coffee so I made it for you."

'_Oh Horatio…' _She thought again.

* * *

**-FLASHBACK-**

"_What would you like in your coffee?" _Horatio asked as he walked off from the lab.

"_Sugar."_ She smiled as she answered and Horatio just chuckled.

**-END OF FLASHBACK-**

* * *

"Calleigh? You okay Sweetheart? You've been doing this quite often since you've been here. If you have a problem, you know you can come to me right? I'm here for you sweetheart." Her mum tried to console and convinces her into telling.

* * *

**-FLASHBACK-**

"_All I'm saying is, that's one hell of a lonely road he's walking."_ Detective John Hagen said as she was busy analyzing the evidence.

"_I know. That's why I'm walking it with him."_ She replied smoothly and without any hesitation.

**-END OF FLASHBACK-**

* * *

Realization suddenly hit her. "Oh my god. I promised to be there for him and I just left him." She said that out loud and immediately stood up.

"Who Calleigh?" Her mum asked, confused.

"Horatio! Oh god…"She said and ran towards her room, packed her stuff and went out of the house without saying another word. Her mum was left confused and getting more worried. Calleigh made her way to the airport immediately but the earliest flight that she could get onto is the next morning's flight. She turned on her cellphone only to realize that there were so many missed calls and text messages from Frank and Eric asking about her whereabouts.

Calleigh opened her voicemails and they were all the same as the text messages except this particular one; the latest one.

"Cal, where ever you are, I hope you receive this. Horatio isn't looking too good. He's been in a rage and not responding well. We need you to come back as fast as you can. Please Cal. We know you're running away but right now, we can't afford that. Horatio can't afford that. We really hope you come back." Eric's voice sounded panicky and defeated in that voicemail.

"Oh god. What have I done to Horatio. Why did I have to take so long to realize my mistake! Now Horatio is in trouble." Calleigh whispered to herself. Waiting for the flight seems like awaiting death; so painful and agonizing.

"Miss, can you check if there's any last minute cancellation please? I really need to get back to Miami as fast as I could."

Ma'am, I'm sorry but I can't help you. There isn't any cancellation. You should have booked it earlier."

"What! You think I know an emergency would happen?" Calleigh made a commotion at the airport and everyone was looking at her but she couldn't care less. All she could think about is Horatio. That voicemail was done yesterday. It has been more than 24 hours now. She really hopes nothing happens to Horatio.

'_Stupid Calleigh! You're really stupid! Must it really take you this long to realize that you love him? Now that he's in trouble, you're regretting it.'_ Calleigh thought to herself; regretting her decision to leave Miami; to run away from Horatio and the fact that Horatio loves her and that Marisol wants her to be with him, to help him, to love him. Marisol didn't need to ask her to do so because she has loved Horatio despite not knowing since when. She decided to call Eric.

"Cal? Where are you? We've been trying to contact you." Eric answered in a panicky yet concerned tone.

"I know. I'm sorry. I needed some time alone."

"Well I hope that helped." Eric replied in a sarcastic tone.

"Eric please…listen to.."

"Listen to you? Cal, you left without a word. You left Horatio in such a vulnerable state despite promising that you'll be there for him. And you want me to listen to you? You shouldn't have even made such promises you can't keep. If this is about me, we could have talked it out." Eric interrupted her.

"Eric…That's not…"

"I'm not done yet Cal. I know this isn't about me. This is about Horatio. About him loving you. About that letter." Eric could hear her gasp in shock. "If you don't love him, tell him. Don't run away. Stop hurting him. You're the last person he would expect to hurt him like that. He's been hurt too much. I've got to admit, even Marisol, my own sister had hurt him. I want you to stop hurting him Cal. He doesn't deserve this."

"Eric, it's not my intention to hurt him at all." She paused.

"I don't care about that Cal. If it is indeed your intention, you have succeeded because you've hurt him really badly and if you still want to continue hurting him, then just don't come back at all. But if it's not, come back." Eric replied coldly.

"How bad is he now?"

"When you left, he couldn't accept it. He went on a rage and was suicidal. He pulled off the wires and everything. He lost all hopes and faith. We had to cuff him to try to control him. And uhm…" Eric paused.

"What? Eric tell me."

"He's in ICU now. He went into a shock and went into coma."

"But I thought he was fine Eric! When I left he was okay!" Calleigh said sobbing into the phone.

"He went into a rage and everything went spiral and out of control. That's when his condition worsened. But he's awake now. Just that the doctors needed to make sure he's stable."

"I'm coming back. Tomorrow."

"Well I hope you don't hurt him anymore Cal. I'll pick you up at the airport then."

Just then, the ticketing officer called her to inform her that there's been a cancellation for a flight that is leaving in 2 hours and Calleigh immediately accepted it. She called Eric immediately and told him about the change in plans. Once Calleigh touched down, Eric was already waiting for her and they made their way to the airport.

"I'm sorry Eric."

"Save that for Horatio." Eric replied coldly.

Once they reached the hospital, Eric brought Calleigh to see Horatio but Calleigh was afraid of how Horatio would react upon seeing her. "Eric… can you come in with me?"

"No Cal. You have got to do this on your own. I can't help you." Eric was right. He couldn't help her anymore. It's up to her right now. She has to make everything right again. Slowly and quietly, she slipped into the room.

"Horatio…" she called out softly but he seemed to be ignoring. "Horatio…" Still no answer. She knew he was awake but he wouldn't respond to her. She knew he heard her. She went towards his bed slowly and sat on the chair by the bed.

"Horatio…I know you're angry at me for breaking my promise and leaving you. I know… and I'm really sorry Horatio…I know I've hurt you so much but it wasn't my intention. I didn't mean to hurt you." Tears were starting to form in her eyes. Horatio just wouldn't turn to her.

"I've heard that exact line before…" Horatio suddenly spoke up softly and he had a tinge of hurt in his voice.

"I know. I know you're hurt and you felt betrayed by me whom you thought would never do such things to you but I admit that I'm at fault. I was scared Horatio." Horatio then turned to look at her this time.

"Scared?" Horatio asked, looking into her eyes. "I was hurt Calleigh. I was betrayed by Marisol, my own wife and was almost killed by her. You know, when you came, after that incident, you gave me my life back. You gave me hope to live. You had faith in me and suddenly you were gone. I felt my life turn upside down Calleigh. It turned dark again. I thought you would stay with me. But I guess I was wrong. I shouldn't have expected anything from you. I don't deserve anything from you at all." Calleigh knew he was so devastated by what happened and her heart shattered at his heartbreaking words.

"Horatio…I…"

"Shhh Calleigh. You don't have to say anything. It's okay. I understand. You have a life and I won't expect anything else from you anymore. I will lead my own life and I appreciate you being there when I needed you the other day." Calleigh had tears streaming down her face and Horatio gently wiped it off. "Thank you Calleigh. Thank you for restoring my faith. From now on, I won't bother your life any longer and…uhm…just ignore the letter. You have your own life, and I have mine. But in all honesty, that's how I feel towards you but you know I don't expect anything from you." Horatio said as he wiped off the remaining tears and gently let go. As Horatio lets go, Calleigh quickly reached up to his hand and held it at her cheek.

"Don't let go. Please." Calleigh pleaded softly.

"Calleigh please. Don't. Don't do this to me anymore."

"No Horatio. I won't hurt you. I want you to expect everything from me. Please Horatio. I may not be able to give you everything but I just want you to expect it from me because I love you Horatio. I love you." She said softly, yet firmly. "I love you."

"I don't want to Calleigh. I don't want to get hurt again. I don't want to expect anything because I know it will only disappoint me. I expected you to be here but you weren't. I trusted you but you broke me. You hurt me." Horatio replied in a defeated tone.

"Horatio I promise…" "Don't make promises you can't keep Calleigh. It will bite on you later." Horatio interrupted her. Calleigh was so hurt by that. His words were so sharp that it felt like a stab to her heart. She felt sick to her gut. Her tongue was tied and she didn't know what else to say. She loved him but she couldn't say it out. Horatio wouldn't trust her.

"I think I need my rest now." Horatio said, signaling her to leave. Calleigh understood and gave him a kiss on his forehead and made her way out of the room. Horatio just watched her leave the room, unable to say anything. He was too hurt.

'_I love you Calleigh.'_ He said to himself.

'_I love you Horatio.' _Calleigh thought to herself.

**TBC... Review?**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N : Thank you for the positive reviews and i'm glad you enjoyed it :) Hope you enjoy this chapter as well**

"Cal? You okay?" Eric rushed to her when he saw her in tears.

"Horatio won't… trust …me …Eric." Calleigh sobbed in between her words. "I've hurt him so much. He won't forgive me…" She sobbed harder.

"Shhh Cal..." He pulled her into a hug, comforting her. "Give him some time. He's been through a lot."

"But I love him. And now it's too late Eric. Too late." She said as she held onto Eric as if her life depended on it. "I don't want to hurt him. I want him to expect everything from me but he wouldn't. He just wouldn't."

Eric held her tighter. "No Cal. It's not too late. Just give him some time to get through this. Just be there for him and prove to him that you love him. I know you love him so much."

"What if he…" "Shhh. Don't." He said as placed his finger on her lips, telling her to stop. "Trust me. He still cares for you. Just give him a little bit more time. I know he still loves you despite Marisol and despite what you did." Eric let go of her and wiped her tears off her face.

"Look at me." Eric said as he gently lifted her chin up. "I want you to trust me. He loves you and nothing can change that. But I don't want you to deny your feelings anymore.

Inside the room, Horatio was still thinking about Calleigh. "She loves me…" He said to himself. "I love you Cal. But I don't want to get hurt. Again. Not after what Marisol did." Horatio then reached out to the drawer and took out the letter that Frank gave to him.

'_Promise me to love Calleigh like you loved me. I know you love her. Don't deny it. Don't waste your life anymore'. _That was part of the letter that kept him thinking. Marisol had explained everything to him through the letter. She was forced and Horatio had forgiven her. Even if he held a grudge, he can do nothing about it.

Calleigh on the other hand was outside the room waiting for Horatio even though she knew he doesn't want to see her. Frank had accompanied her for the night. Right then, she took out a notepad.

"Seriously?" Frank spoke.

"What?"

"What's with you guys and letters?" He asked mockingly. "First was Horatio.. then Marisol.. then again Marisol writing to you and Horatio. Now you. Cal, seriously? If you continue with that, I'm gonna take that paper and burn it right here and now." Frank said in a serious tone. Calleigh looked at him, amused.

"Not funny Cal. I'm serious."

"But you really sound funny." Calleigh joked and laughed at that.

"I'm glad I made you laugh." He smiled. "But really, throw that thing away. I don't even want to see it anymore." He replied in disgust. Calleigh laughed hard at Frank's expression and put away the notepad back into where it belonged.

"Okay I've put it away. Don't give me that disgusted look please." Calleigh gave her cheekiest smile.

"And you." He said as he pointed to her. "Stop giving me that cute face and step up and go into Horatio's room. You don't belong here."

"But…"

"No buts. Or I'm going to lock you in there." He said in an authoritative tone and she couldn't argue. Calleigh went in and stayed with Horatio. She took great care of Horatio despite him still acting cold towards her. Horatio would only give her cold shoulders and try to ignore her. Days passed by and Horatio was recovering fully. His liver was on its way to full recovery and he has also been seeing the therapist to help him with his emotional and psychological trauma. He was gradually improving and was allowed to go home but not allowed to go to work. He was put on medical leave although he hated that but he couldn't argue with the doctor.

"Calleigh, you don't have to slave yourself for me. You don't have to come home with me to take care of me. I think I can manage it on my own. You've got a life and I don't want to impose on you. I'll see you at the lab once I am given the green light to start working." Horatio said to her once they have done the administrative matters.

"But Horatio…"

"No Calleigh. Please. I think I can manage it on my own. I just want to thank you once again for taking care of me these few days." Horatio said and immediately walked away to get a taxi. Calleigh did not go after him since he has already made it clear to him that he doesn't need her help. She was upset that Horatio wouldn't allow her to come with him but she understood that he probably needed some time to forgive her for hurting him. She understood that heartbreak isn't easy.

Horatio on the other hand did not go home to his place straight. Being a true believer and realized that he has sinned, he made his way to the church. He needed something to hold on to and that was the only place he could go to. He needed to ease his mind and take away everything from his mind. Once he arrived at the church, he took his time to look around and appreciate his surroundings. He came to this place every time he had problems. He made his way to the booth and sat there for a moment before pushing the screen.

"Horatio."

"Father."

"You coming to confess a new sin?" The priest asked.

Months ago, he came to this exact place and came to the priest to confess a sin that never changed. He could never get past it.

-FLASHBACK-

"_You coming to confess a new sin?" The priest asked._

"_No. Same one." Horatio answered him in a shaky voice._

"_You're angry." He stated._

"_Father, I am…I am confused." He stuttered, unsure of what to say._

"_You know guilt takes many forms."_

"_Father, I have been over this and over this a thousand times and I am certain with every fibre in my body that I couldn't have done anything differently." Horatio spoke in an unsteadily and shakily manner. Tears were forming in his eyes._

"_I told you when you came to me. It was many years ago, with blood in your hands, that it isn't about the lives that you took. It's about the lives that you make right and here and now and that's what God is judging you on." The priest tried to assure him._

"_I know what my past is." He stated._

"_Then why're you here?" The priest questioned him._

"_I need you to tell me." Horatio answered in a defeated and distraught tone. He was a wreck and he was breaking down at that moment. He had tears in his eyes and he didn't care._

"_When you've done enough Horatio, you'll know." _

-END OF FLASHBACK-

"Horatio." The Priest realized that Horatio was quiet.

"Yes Father." He paused. "I'm here to confess a new sin." He finally said it. The priest looked surprised. "I tried to end my life."

"Horatio, when you came to me months ago, when I told you that you'll know when you've done enough, this isn't what I meant."

"I know Father. But I've had enough. I've done enough. My entire life I tried to save people and here I am with no one to save me."

"You have people who want to save you but you won't allow them. Forgive yourself and move on Horatio."

"I don't know. I just let go of a woman that I love."

"Go to her Horatio. Let her help you."

"She hurt me. My wife hurt me. My wife left and she too, left. Everyone leaves."

"Horatio, that's part of life. If you love someone, you risk yourself to being hurt. Let her in Horatio. Let her help you for once. Give her your trust and she will treasure it. And she won't leave you again. Give her another chance." The priest encouraged him. With that, the priest ended the session with a prayer and Horatio left the church for home.

Later that night, Horatio sat on his porch, embracing the cold night with coffee to accompany him through the night.

'_I love you Horatio. I love you.'_ Those were the words that Calleigh said before Horatio asked her to leave. Those words kept replaying in his mind over and over again. _'Promise me to love Calleigh like you loved me. I know you love her. Don't deny it. Don't waste your life anymore'_. He made that promise to Marisol. He himself knew that he loves Calleigh but he was just too afraid of letting her in. He was afraid that she too, would leave again and he would be alone all over again.

'_Let her in Horatio. Let her help you for once. Give her your trust and she will treasure it. And she won't leave you again. Give her another chance.' _He suddenly remembered what the priest said. "Maybe he's right." He said to himself.

'_He is right Horatio. Give her another chance. You deserve to be loved. Go to her.'_ Suddenly he hears a small voice in his head. He knew right there and then that there was only one thing left to do. He needed to go to her. He immediately put on his sweatshirt and drove off to Calleigh's place. Upon reaching her place, he noticed a familiar car. It was Eric's car. _"What is he doing here in the middle of the night?"_ He thought to himself. Just then, he saw something through the window. Eric and Calleigh together. They were together and in each other's arms.

"SO MUCH FOR LOVE!" He screamed and kicked off a rubbish bin, not caring about his surroundings. He was making lots of noise and it had gotten attention from both Calleigh and Eric. Both of them went out to see what was going on when they saw Horatio outside the house, kicking the car and screaming.

"Horatio?" Calleigh called out. Horatio turned to her and screamed. "SO MUCH FOR LOVE CALLEIGH! SO MUCH FOR LOVE!"

"Horatio what are you saying?" She was almost in tears.

"YOU CALL THIS LOVE HUH? YOU TOLD ME YOU LOVE ME AND YOU'RE WITH HIM IN HIS ARMS!" Horatio shouted again. His fists were so tightly balled, trying to control his emotions and suddenly he just slammed his fist on the car causing his knuckles to bleed.

"Horatio, you're getting this all wrong. It's not what it looks like." Calleigh was pleading him to listen to her.

"Oh this is just what it looks like. You know what, I was just about to let you in into my life but well… I guess I took it all wrong. That day, it was just out of pity." Horatio said loudly as he made his way to the driver's seat, wanting to leave.

**TBC... What do you think of this chapter? Review? ;)**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Thank you for your reviews :) hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I have enjoyed writing it ;)**

Eric pulled him back harshly. "Listen to her H!" Eric raised his voice. "It's not what it looks like. You misunderstood the whole situation." Eric smiled softly.

"I've seen it all. Whatever Eric. Whatever." He said as he tried to get Eric off him.

"I'm not letting you go. You listen to me right now H. We have nothing going on. Although we did kiss." Eric smirked mischievously. Calleigh's eyes widened and she almost broke down into tears and Horatio almost punched Eric in his face.

"Chill man. I kissed her and she slapped me. Look H. Whatever it is, she loves you and she'll never cheat on you or leave you. It took her some time to realize that she really did love you but now, she has discovered it and is ready to admit it. Believe me when I said nothing is going on between us. I was here to console her after you left her at the hospital saying that you don't need her. She was devastated H." He let go of Horatio and continued. "Now that you're here and you just said that you're letting her in, she's all yours. You made the right decision Brother. This is what Marisol would have wanted you to do." Eric patted Horatio's back and left him to Calleigh. "He's all yours Cal!" He shouted cheerfully.

"Horatio…" Calleigh touched and gently caressing his face and Horatio gently reached up to her and wiped the tears of her face.

"I'm sorry Calleigh. I shouldn't have pushed you away." He said as he tilted and lowered his head so as to allow his lips to meet hers. He gave her lips a quick brush. He was unsure until Calleigh put her arms around his neck to deepen the kiss till they were out of breath. Leaning forehead to forehead, they panted for air.

"I love you Horatio." She said while gasping for air.

"I love you too." Horatio paused. "Don't leave me anymore Calleigh. I'm afraid of this but I'm giving it a chance. I need you to be my anchor to my ship, a light for the dark and I need you Calleigh. You are everything to me."

"Oh handsome. I'll be here when you need me to. I'll never leave you again." Calleigh kissed him again. "We'll take it slow alright. We'll let you adjust okay." Calleigh gave him the most assuring smile.

"Come on. Let's clean you up. Look at your hand, let me put something for it." She said as she pulled him gently towards the house. She told him to wait at the couch as she went in to take the first aid kit to clean up his wounded hand.

Calleigh was focusing on cleaning his hand when he suddenly spoke. "Calleigh, I'm sorry for pushing you away and treated you so badly despite-" Calleigh immediately stopped him by kissing him passionately. They broke apart for air and she gave him her 1000-watt smile.

"It's okay Handsome. I understand. You did what you felt right and I don't blame you. I'm at fault too." Right then, Horatio leaned forward and kissed her once again, slowly progressing down to her neck, gently and sweetly nibbling on it. "Oh Horatio…" She moaned as Horatio continued his sweet assault on her. In one swift move, he lifted her up onto his lap and turned to be on top of her, with her laying on the couch. He continued kissing her gently, slowly moving to her collar bone and down to her chest.

"Oh Horatio…" She moaned again in pleasure. Horatio caught her lips again and had deepened the kiss. His hands travelled down her shirt as he starts to unbutton them, lowering his kisses to her breasts. Suddenly Calleigh grabbed his hands, stopping him from moving further. Horatio was taken aback by her action and looked at her, puzzled.

"Calleigh?" He asked in confusion.

"We don't want to do this Horatio. We promised to take it slow didn't we? You need some time Horatio." She said as she reached up to his face gently and kissed him softly. "When you're more ready okay." She didn't ask. That was a mere statement. Horatio just looked at her in a daze. She cupped his face and planted a soft kiss on his lips then pulled him to her room.

"Come on. Let's get you to bed Handsome."

"Calleigh…" He pulled back. "Please?" He almost had tears in his eyes. "I need to know." From that, Calleigh understood him. She understood that he needed to feel alive; that he needed to know that this was real. Right then she immediately leaned in and gave him a passionate kiss, pulling him into the bedroom and allowed him to lead on.

As they made their way to the bedroom, Horatio never did let go of her. He was busy undressing her piece by piece. At the door, he lifted her up to his waist as his hands traces down her back until his fingers are inside the waistband of her underwear and stretching it a bit as he eases it off her. Feeling the smoothness of her back, he bends her backwards, laying her on the bed and slowly kisses his way up her throat and up to her warm, soft lips. Calleigh couldn't help but to moan into the kiss. His kisses were soft and sensual; Calleigh couldn't resist arching into him and feeling his already hardening manhood.

He began teasing her, inserting his finger slowly into her wet velvety fold. Calleigh couldn't help it but to part her thighs slightly as she arches towards him. Everytime she is about to lose control, Horatio slowly slips his finger out of her, leaving her so frustrated. "Horatio…please…" She begged while she had tears in her eyes. She couldn't take it anymore. She needed him right there and then but Horatio was in control and he wouldn't give it to her. He kept on teasing and putting her on her on the edge but not letting her release. He needed to feel powerful. Gasping softly she feels him parting her legs to torture her again. Calleigh couldn't take it anymore.

"Horatio…please…" She begged again. "Please…" She pleaded softly whilst her emerald green eyes silently begging him to take her. Horatio finally gave in and nodded, giving her the permission to undo his pants.

Calleigh started unbuckling his belt, slowly moving down to his button and zipper to free his hard manhood. Horatio flinched a little. "Please…?" Horatio relaxed at that. Horatio positioned himself above her, slowly and smoothly inserted himself into her, thrusting into her gently, allowing her to get used to him. As he slowly thrusts into her, she grips the sheets beneath her and her body near shivering with pleasure as yet another orgasm rocks her body and goose bumps rise over her flesh.

"Ooohh..God Horatio!" Calleigh moaned, enough to almost push him over the edge. He felt like God and he felt so powerful at that moment. "Faster Horatio, faster." She said as she bucked into him, pacing the rhythm with him. She saw the tears in his eyes. Calleigh knew he was giving it his all and he was giving everything he's got to her. He didn't need to prove anything to her but he needed that and she let him be.

"Oh sweet lord Horatio. Just keep going. I'm so close.." She moaned and this was just enough encouragement for him. As time passes by, his thrusts were faster and stronger which made her dug into him. "Good lord HORATIO!" She screamed as she came, clenching around him tightly and that sent him over the edge making him follow her lead and spill his seeds into her. Exhausted, he supported his weight on his one elbow and kissed Calleigh passionately then he rolls over to hold her and she starts to relax. Laying her head against the strength of his chest she closes her eyes lost in the moment.

"Calleigh…" He looked her in the eyes and whispered "Thank you for making me feel alive" as he kissed her forehead and Calleigh gently wiped off the tears on his face. That night, Horatio had felt so alive. He felt real. He needed that to go on with his life.

The next morning, Horatio awoke to an empty bed. For a moment he panicked and peeked under the sheets.

'_Last night felt real'_ He thought and looked around. It wasn't his room. He kept looking around to make sense of what happened until Calleigh came in.

"Morning Handsome." Calleigh greeted him in a cheerful tone.

"Calleigh…" He was still trying to put things together and making sense of it. Calleigh came in with a tray of breakfast and served him breakfast in bed. As she placed the tray on the bed, she planted a soft kiss on his lips and whispered seductively "Thank you for last night."

Now everything came back to him. It was real. It happened. He smiled shyly and blushed. "Thank you too sweetheart" He replied and chuckled softly.

"Handsome, I have to get ready and go to work. Will you be alright here or do you want me to drop you at your place?" Calleigh asked softly.

"I brought my car here. So I think I'll drive back."

"Alright." She replied and leaned into his ears and whispered seductively "Care to join me in the shower?" Horatio chuckled and Calleigh pulled his hand and went into the bathroom where they continued their passionate love-making session.

"I'll see you at lunch." Horatio gave her a peck and headed home.

"Horatio…" She called out and he turned. "Be careful." She smiled as she got into the car and went to work. Everything turned out great for them and Calleigh hoped that Horatio is turning over for the better.

**TBC...What do you think?**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N : Sorry for making you wait for a long time. i was too busy and when the show ended, it just broke my heart further. But trust me, I think I will try to update more and write more stories. But for now, this is the final chapter of this story. I hope you have enjoyed it.**

That afternoon, Horatio went to the lab to bring Calleigh out for lunch but he noticed that she was busy in the lab, analyzing and comparing bullets. He approached the lab and went in quietly so as not to startle her.

"Hey Handsome." Calleigh greeted him as soon as he entered. Her attention was still focused on the computer, waiting for a match to appear.

"Oh…You realized. Sorry. I didn't want to startle you." Horatio answered softly. Calleigh turned to face him and gave him a passionate kiss.

"You don't have to say anything. I know when you're here." Horatio raised an eyebrow, surprised. "I just know okay. Don't ask me how or why." She smiled.

"Okay I won't ask. Care to accompany me for lunch?" He asked but he got a frown for an answer. "I'm sorry Horatio." Calleigh felt guilty for turning him down.

"It's okay… I understand. You have loads of bullets to compare." He smiled weakly. "That's why I ordered in. Shall we?" He asked as he raised his arm for an interlock.

"You know so much and too well." Calleigh smiled and gave him a peck. "Of course I do. That's my job." They went into his office where he already prepared the lunch and all they had to do was eat.

A few minutes into their lunch, Frank barged into Horatio's office, interrupting their time together.

"We've got a shooting downtown. We need you to be on deck Cal." Frank said.

"You may need an extra hand" Horatio offered.

"That may not be necessary H. We already have all patrol on it. Besides, you're still on medical leave." Horatio didn't look too happy with but had to give in to it. He was still on medical leave. As Calleigh and Frank were leaving the office, Horatio reminded them to be careful.

The case turned out to be gang-related and all suspects have been apprehended. That evening, Calleigh came home to a pleasant and mouthwatering aroma.

"Horatio? Are you here?" Calleigh called out. She knew it was him but she needed to make sure.

"Hey Sweetheart. Come on in. I'm making dinner." Calleigh went straight into the kitchen and found him adorably in her apron.

"Oh Handsome. That smells delicious! And you look so adorable in that apron. I think you need to do this everyday." Calleigh joked and gave a kiss on his blushing cheek. She helped him set up the table and waited for him to finish his cooking.

"So how was your day Sweetheart?" Horatio asked.

"Busy as you know it. I miss you at the lab." Calleigh replied quietly as she enjoyed the dinner.

Right after dinner, the couple watched a few movies together and went to bed; except, Horatio couldn't fall asleep. He was just lying there, looking up to the ceiling thinking of the past few weeks that has been truly emotional for him. It has been a tough time for him but he's moving on from what happened and Calleigh is slowly helping him with that.

"Horatio?" Calleigh called out softly and it startled Horatio a little.

"Hey. Aren't you supposed to be asleep?" He asked as he turned towards her. She shook her head and turned her focus onto Horatio. Gently tracing his jawline, she asked "Are you okay? Care to share?"

He looked straight into her eyes, seeing only pure concern. "I was just thinking about what happened these few weeks." He explained.

"Oh Horatio…I know those were very bad weeks for you. But you will get through this alright. I'm here for you." Calleigh said in a soothing tone. "Oh. Tell me what you saw the other day. I know you were dying to tell me the other day at the hospital." Calleigh jested.

"Oh right." Horatio smiled. "Well I saw you. I don't know how or why but I saw you when I was held at gunpoint. Everything came back to me. It was like a flash of my life." He paused. "I saw Marisol. The time we spent together…" He paused again. "On our wedding day. And then I saw you. You being here for me and that made me realize that you have always been with me all these while."

"Hey…I'm always going to be here whether you like it or not." She kissed him on the lips right after. "Go to sleep Horatio. I'll be here when you wake up." She smiled and snuggled into him.

A month passed by and Horatio felt ready to go to work. He couldn't stand any longer being at home. It was driving him crazy. He went for his check up and had requested to be given the clearance to go to work. He didn't mind desk duties as long as he no longer needs to stay home.

"Alright. I'm going to clear you for desk duties but not more. No field work. Nothing exertive. We don't need to pressure your organs again." The doctor joked. Horatio agreed on that. That day onwards, he just stayed indoors in his office as per instructed by his doctor. He took that opportunity to finish up his piled up paperwork which only took him 2 weeks to complete. Horatio decided then to just show up at a crime scene. He was sick and tired of staying indoors and he needed the adrenaline rush and had to be out there.

As he stepped out of the hummer, Calleigh saw him and rushed to him.

"Horatio! What are you doing here?" Calleigh asked in a firm but worried tone.

"I'm sick and tired of being in the lab. I need the Miami sun." Horatio smiled cheekily.

"Oh no Mister, don't give me that cheeky and charming smile of yours. You're not getting away with this." She said firmly. "The doctor hasn't cleared you yet for field work Horatio."

"But Sweetheart, I'm just here to…" He didn't get the chance to finish his sentence when she interrupted him.

"No buts Horatio. I want you to get back in that hummer and drive back to the lab." Horatio wanted to argue further with her but she walked away as fast as she said that to Horatio and he didn't want to create a commotion with the whole team being there. He drove back to the lab feeling so agitated and angry. As soon as he reached the lab, he went straight to the mini gun range in the Ballistics Lab to shoot off some steam.

Calleigh reached the lab and saw Horatio in her lab shooting at the human targets. She didn't disturb him nor did she go into the lab. She knew he was angry because of the event earlier and this was the only way that he could release his anger without hurting himself. Just as he finished his last round, Calleigh entered the lab quietly, not to startle him.

"I'm sorry Horatio." She said quietly, almost whispering.

"Oh the hell you're sorry." He mumbled. He was still pissed at what happened earlier.

"Excuse me? What was that?" Despite Horatio mumbling, she could still make out the words that came out of his mouth.

"Nothing." He said and walked off from the lab.

"Horatio. You know I was worried for you back there right. I didn't want anything to happen to you." Calleigh said and Horatio stopped at the door turning to her.

"Yeah. But you didn't have to embarrass me in front of the team." He said softly.

"I didn't Horatio. I meant well and they know very well that you're in no position to be there yet."

"Why can't you just trust me! I'm fine! It's not like I will die or something!" Horatio blared.

"Horatio. Will you calm down please? I know you're fine but you're not allowed to be on the field yet." Calleigh said trying to calm him down.

"Oh yeah? You just can't trust me can you? You think I'm on a suicide mission again?" He shouted. Calleigh was speechless. She didn't expect this conversation to take such a turn.

"Horatio…" She called out softly.

"You don't even trust me! Why the hell was I so stupid! And to think I trusted you with my life! With everything I have left!"

"Horatio please…" She begged, reaching up to his arm.

"Get off me!"

"I won't! I was really being thoughtful for you! I didn't want you to risk yourself being out there. Why can't you just understand that?" This time, Calleigh was furious.

"You just don't understand me! Why can't you just let me do things on my own! Who are you to even control me!" Calleigh was hurt by his words and she felt achy to her guts. She tried to control her tears as Horatio said those hurtful words.

"Even Marisol doesn't try to control me!" Calleigh stared at him in shock. _'Did he just compare me to Marisol?'_ She asked herself in her thoughts. _'Yeah. He did.'_

Horatio paused at that. He realized he went overboard when he compared Calleigh to Marisol. He saw the tear and the hurt in Calleigh's eyes. She was quiet. No words could come out of her. She was just standing there feeling so hurt and Horatio didn't know what else to say.

"Cal…I…uh…I'm…" He stuttered. Calleigh didn't give him any chance to finish. She just stormed out of the lab, leaving Horatio alone in a daze.

Horatio on the other hand regretted what he had said to Calleigh. He had unconsciously compared her to Marisol and he blew it all up. He screwed up the relationship for his damn ego. He tried to look for Calleigh but she wasn't anywhere in the lab. He even tried calling her cellphone but she wasn't answering. For the rest of his shift, there was nothing else besides Calleigh that ran through his mind. He was sure he hurt her so much.

That evening, he went straight to Calleigh's to make sure she was alright and he needed to apologize to her for earlier. The lights were off and her car wasn't there. Horatio was getting worried and he decided to call Eric.

"Eric. It's H. Is Calleigh with you?"

"Nope. What's up H?"

"Oh. Uhh… it's nothing. Talk to you later." He said and put away his cellphone. He didn't know where Calleigh went and there was no way he could track her so he decided to call it a day and went home instead.

The next day, Horatio went to work only to find the Ballistics Lab empty. He went to the receptionist to ask about her whereabouts and was told by Frank that they had a case and Calleigh was on scene. He waited for Calleigh to return to the lab to talk but apparently luck wasn't on his side. Calleigh didn't have time because the case they had just gotten was priority and she was busy.

Days passed by and Horatio hasn't talked to Calleigh because she has been slogging over the bullets and cases. He tried calling and going to her place but her place was empty. She hasn't been going home and he didn't know where she stayed all these while.

He went to work the next day and immediately looked for Calleigh. There was nothing that would stop him or her from having the talk. The moment he stepped into the lab, he saw Calleigh walking towards the pantry. He followed her to the pantry where she was taking a sip of her coffee and he made himself busy with the coffee.

"Hey." He greeted her softly. He realized she was looking rather pale. _'Must be the workload and lack of rest.' _He thought.

"Hey." She replied him with only that as she focused her attention on the morning papers. It went quiet. Horatio didn't know what else to say to her.

"I'll give you the report later. In an hour." She stated as she walked out of the pantry.

"Calleigh. Wait." He rushed to her and grabbed her arm firmly but not roughly.

"What do you want?" Horatio let go of her arm and took the coffee from her, placing it back on the counter. Horatio looked straight into her eyes. She had the hurt in her eyes; just like the day when he unconsciously compared her to his dead wife.

Calleigh realized that she had tears forming in her eyes and she quickly glanced away, avoiding his eye contact.

"Calleigh, look at me." He said as he gently lifted her chin.

"Look into my eyes Calleigh. I need you to hear me. I need you to know that I never meant to hurt you. I can't promise that I won't ever be hesitant or cautious but I am committed and I pledge to make this work." He then hugged her tight, as if his life depended on it.

"Trust me Calleigh, I don't want to lose you. I need you." Suddenly he felt heavy, as if someone was putting loads of pressure on him and he realized that it was Calleigh.

"Calleigh…" She didn't respond and Horatio felt heavier. He quickly brought Calleigh to the couch and placed her gently on it, immediately calling 911. She looked really pale. In the hospital, Horatio was pacing up and down until the doctor came in to talk to him.

"Lieutenant?"

"Doctor. How is she?"

"Can we talk for a second? In my office." Horatio nodded, fearing the worse. "Right this way." The doctor guided him. As soon as they reached the office, Horatio settled down quickly and waited nervously for the bad news.

"What's wrong with her? Is it anything serious?" Horatio asked in a concerned tone.

"Nothing too serious. She is just lacking of rest. Does she have any close family or a boyfriend or fiancée that we can contact? Because as far as I am concerned, you are her emergency contact."

"Yes. I am her emergency contact and yes she has a boyfriend."

"Alright. Can you contact him? Because this is very important."

"Oh. You're talking to him right now."

"Oh right. I should have known." The doctor smiled. "I assume you were informed that she is pregnant?" The doctor asked. Horatio was surprised. He was speechless.

"Ahhh. From your expression, I take it you didn't know." Horatio didn't reply.

'_We used protection as far I know. Wait. How can that be possible? How can she be pregnant if we used protection?'_

"Seven weeks now." The doctor continued.

'_Seven weeks…'_ He thought. _'Seven weeks…'_ He counted back. _'Oh right. That was the first time we were together. And we didn't bother. Oh crap. I should have known that I am still capable of impregnating her.' _He thought as he smiled to himself.

"Lieutenant? Are you still here?" The doctor called out to him.

"Ohh..uhh..yes. I'll make sure she won't strain herself anymore. Can I see her now?" The doctor nodded. "Thank you." Horatio said as he walked out of the office and went straight to her room.

He swiftly and quietly slipped through the door and went to her bedside. "Hey sweetheart." She turned to him at the call.

"Hey." She smiled weakly.

"You got me worried for a second there you know. Why didn't you tell me?" Calleigh couldn't keep her eye contact anymore. She looked over to the window.

"Cal…" He called as he reached out to her.

"I'm sorry…I just didn't want to burden you anymore. I mean…uhh…I didn't want to…" She stuttered as tears rolled down her cheek.

"Hey…shhh…it's okay. You're not burdening me."

"No Horatio. This was my fault. I should have…"

"Shhh. Calleigh, it wasn't your fault. None of this is a mistake."

"I don't want to tie you down. I don't want to control your life Horatio. I wanted to keep this from you and just leave to bring this child on my own." His heart broke.

'_She wanted to keep it from me.' _He thought.

"Calleigh, I want you to understand that none of this is a mistake. I don't want you to exclude me please. I need this Calleigh. I need you. If this baby here is a mistake, I won't be here, telling you otherwise. Look at me Sweetheart." He said as he gently turned her face to him.

"I want this. I want this baby. And I want you. I need you. He is mine and I am going to be there for him and for you. We will make this work. I want you to trust me like I trust you with my life. And I don't want you to stop controlling me for you are the anchor to my ship and that's what you're going to do. You're going to stop me if I'm going to do anything stupid." He said assuringly. Calleigh nodded. "And Calleigh, I'm sorry. I didn't know I could still...you know..." He said blushingly. Calleigh laughed and that made him chuckle.

Calleigh smiled at him, knowing that this has been a miracle and she liked the sound of that. She was looking forward to a future with him.

**End :)**

**A/N : Thank you for staying through this story. I hope you have enjoyed it. And I look forward to your reviews. It would definitely help me in writing more stories to come. Stay Tuned. :)**


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